Helping Your Fussy Toddler Eat Well

Dear Parents,

It's completely normal for toddlers to go through phases of refusing food or being incredibly fussy at mealtimes. While this is a typical part of development, it can be a significant source of stress and frustration for the whole family.

Fortunately, with a little patience and a few simple strategies, you can transform mealtimes. You'll be able to create a calmer environment, encourage healthy eating habits, and help your child develop a relaxed and positive relationship with food.

Why toddlers refuse food

  • Food refusal is normal at this age, especially around 2 years.
  • Appetite is smaller after the first year because growth slows down.
  • Toddlers may eat very little at some meals – this is common.
  • Saying “no” is part of learning independence.

If you are worried, your doctor can check your child’s growth.

What to expect

  • 3 small meals plus 2–3 snacks each day.
  • Appetite will vary from day to day.
  • Missing a meal will not harm your child.
  • Playing with food can help them learn to accept new foods.
  • Children may need to see a food many times before accepting it.
  • Eating together as a family (without TV) helps.

Tips for mealtimes

  • Keep mealtimes calm and regular.
  • Involve your child (wash vegetables, set the table).
  • Use colourful plates and finger foods.
  • Give small portions – they can always ask for more.
  • Set a 20-minute limit for meals.
  • Offer a healthy second course (fruit, yoghurt).
  • Praise good behaviour; ignore fussing.
  • Gentle encouragement is fine, but never force feed.
  • Stay calm – even if you feel frustrated.

Giving your child some control

  • Let them feed themselves.
  • Offer a maximum of two choices.
  • Do not cook something else if they refuse the meal.
  • Avoid bribes or food rewards (e.g. “eat veg to get pudding”).

Drinks and appetite

  • Too much milk or juice can reduce hunger.
  • Milk: no more than 500 per day.
  • Best drink: water, freely available all day.
  • Use a cup or beaker from 6 months. Stop bottles by 12 months to protect teeth.

Trying new foods

  • Keep offering – it may take 15–20 tries before a food is accepted.
  • Introduce one new food at a time, in small amounts.
  • Pair new foods with favourites.
  • Eating with other children can encourage trying.
  • Respect strong dislikes, but don’t give up too soon.

Remember

  • You decide what and when to serve.
  • Your child decides how much to eat.